I have to start this blog with a link to an article from one of my favorite satire publications, The Onion. The article reminds me a lot of how I used to be…my old thought process.
I decided to take the day off of work. My alarm went off at 5:45am–and I immediately wrote my boss an email stating that i’d be staying home today. Lila and I had a great weekend–I think, at times, I just get exhausted from everything going on, and I have to seize the days where I have an empty calendar, and take some time for myself. Overall, things are going well and I have absolutely nothing to complain about.
Lila and I had what I like to call a Low Budget Weekend. I have been trying to save–and the last few weekends that Lila spent with me consisted of a trip to San Francisco, day in Santa Cruz and attending some local attractions here in San Jose. I was spending a good bit of money–and needed to dial it back this weekend. We hit the local library, played basketball, ventured to a few playgrounds, rode the razor scooter, watched movies, cooked good food and practiced Lila’s reading/writing. It was refreshing to just chill out. At one point Lila was riding her razor scooter as we were journeying through the campus of San Jose State University and she said “daddy, i’m happy.”
It makes me tear up writing about that moment–because it was so damn meaningful. It put everything in perspective. I never have to ask myself “why am I on this earth” or “why did I stop drinking?” The answer is right in front of me–and my objective in life is to continue creating a happy environment for Lila. I could tell, when she spoke those words, that she was actually experiencing what true happiness felt like. How amazing it was.
If I were still an active alcoholic–most likely we wouldn’t have been walking through the campus of San Jose State University after a few hours at the library. No, I would’ve cut our quality time short to stop by the store for some beers…then, we would’ve went home and Lila would watch TV as I drank the day away. Still, it has been less than a year since I removed alcohol from my life–I can’t fool myself into thinking i’m cured. But, I will admit that many wonderful memories, in just 329 days, have been created due to abstaining from booze. That is a fact.
I went on a date with a young lady last Sunday. Her name is Cherry. Yes, Cherry. I’m not sure if it’s her real name–lets’ just say she’s eccentric. She actually used the word eccentric–I would say she’s sort of strange…but in such an intriguing way. When we first met, I thought maybe she was on drugs–she seemed a bit out of it, and I couldn’t really comprehend what she was saying. She used a lot of big words–but i’m not sure if the order in which she said the words actually made a complete sentence…I just sat there and shook my head. Each time I got confused–I just asked her a simple question to redirect the conversation. Normally, I would’ve ended the date in a graceful, yet abrupt manner–but something kept me sitting at the table. Within the confusion was a sprinkle of brilliance. I could tell she has gone through a lot emotionally–she kept alluding to a big “transition” in her life. So, I just asked her–“did you go through a divorce or something?” She nodded her head “yes.” I just left it at that–it wasn’t the time or place to fish for more information…plus, I was having a ton of fun just listening to her put together sentences with random big words.
Cherry is stunning–one of the most attractive girls I have ever seen. She is a 5’2″ Vietnamese woman with an athletic body. Her hair is jet black, and the perfect length–resting around her lower back. She initially had her hair in a pony tail, and at some point she became more relaxed–Cherry then took out the pony tail, rain her fingers through her hair, shook her head back and forth–and the jet black hair perfectly bounced around the room, beautifully resting on her cheeks and shoulders. Her eyes were peeking up at me through hair draped like a curtain before a broad-way show–the anticipation of what resides behind is immense. I could see these two beautiful almond shaped eyes and a pretty little smile. That was the point where I knew I liked Cherry. I felt comfortable–we laughed, and talked the night away. I didn’t comprehend everything she was saying–but I didn’t care, it just felt really nice.
Maybe i’m shallow? Maybe if she wasn’t so damn beautiful I would have left the establishment, never to see her again? Maybe not? Who fucking knows–what I know is that we all have flaws, challenges, skeletons–no one is perfect. I absolutely love Cherry’s imperfections…they make her…Cherry. Is that her real name? I have no god damn clue–but if not, it’s so Cherry to introduce herself as one of the most delicious fruits on the planet. God damn there’s just something about this woman.
She sent me a text a few days after our first date. I always wait for the woman to follow-up because I don’t want to seem too eager–and the fact that they reach out shows they have a real interest. The text messages were like our conversation–I had no clue what she was saying sometimes, but I loved it. I asked her–“when can I see you again?” She said “I don’t know, I have a lot of paper-work to do.” I thought to myself, “paperwork?” What kind of paperwork? Who knows. So I said “ok.”
Then, a few days later, which happened to be last night–she wrote me again. “I was wondering if I can see you again?” I said “sure, come over at 9pm after Lila falls asleep–we can watch a movie or something.” So, she did. Right away we were on the couch holding hands–she brought over a bunch of random candy–and brought me duck eggs. Like, what the fuck? It was a strange and thoughtful way of Cherry expressing her feelings for me. I felt it–I felt that she cared, and it was a token of her appreciation. We laid down at one point, just hugging each-other…I was an absolute gentleman, of course. And I said to her “I really like you–can I see you again tomorrow.” She said “I don’t know, I have a lot of paperwork.” I didn’t even ask.
Cherry left at around mid-night–and I told her “i’ll wait for you to let me know when we can meet again.” She left, and sent me a text–just a smiley face emoticon.
Cherry is an amazing human being–and i’m so curious as to what, if anything, will happen next.